When Parenthood Is Messy

As the parents of only one child, Dave and I have only experienced a small supply of messes. Although I was half-asleep those first few months of parenthood, I well remember the fountain of spit-up that would follow a feeding, the numerous loads of laundry full of stained clothes, and the emergency baths when wipes just weren't going to cut it.

I know that in the future, we'll likely experience the "fun" of cleaning up a finger paint mural on the wall or floor, the spilled milk on the kitchen counter, the baby powder blanketing the nursery. And, if we have any other children, we'll get to experience the spit-up stage again and again.

But whenever G makes a mess, like she did tonight even, I don't yell at her or decide that the mess is too big to clean up and just give up on being her mama. I clean it up (sometimes frantically before she can get into it again) and give her a cuddle if she's feeling upset about it. I realize that making messes is all a part of G's life right now.

Currently, we're still dealing with the physical messes, but I know that we'll experience other messes, too. The ones that aren't so easy to clean up. The ones that require a prayer for wisdom as we navigate a broken friendship or a broken heart together.

Parenthood is full of messes, but we as Christians have an amazing example of what it looks like to be a good parent. Our heavenly Father patiently walks with us through our messes. He doesn't give up on loving us, no matter how big the mess may be.

As I think about the mess we had to clean up and the love I still feel for my daughter even though she required a lot of work tonight, I'm reminded of my Father, who still loves me even when I make my own big messes.

Hospitality

Two of our dear friends have just left after an enjoyable evening of cheesecake, coffee, and conversation, and I must say it was a wonderful way to kick off the weekend. These are friends we don't have to put on a show for. Yes, I did tidy up a bit before they came, but I didn't care that there was a pile of baby clothes still on the bar stool in the kitchen. Tonight, we were all able to relax as we chatted and sipped our coffee.

Dave and I decided to be intentional about inviting people to our home on a Friday night for dessert. Our original goal was to do this twice a month, but given our other social commitments on Friday nights, it seems one time a month is working well. I suppose you could say it was a New Year's resolution considering it began in January with inviting two of my coworkers and their husbands. We simply pick up a pie or other special treat, bring out the box of K-cups for guests to choose from, and chat about anything and everything either around the kitchen table or spread out among the comfy leather couches in the living room.

Although I'm an introvert at heart, one of my desires is to open our home to others. Through our marriage, this has taken many forms. We've hosted college students here on choir tours, friends and family visiting from Scotland, small group meetings, and annual Christmas parties. At this stage in our lives, it's a bit more difficult to go out in the evenings when Miss G's bedtime is 6:30, so it makes perfect sense to invite people over instead of making plans to meet at a restaurant. Buying something already made at the grocery store may not sound as charming as a homemade treat, but it's the best I can do for now, and I'm perfectly fine with that. What matters to me is that our friends feel at home when they visit.

And, really, I think that's what hospitality is all about. Forget about the fancy desserts or the entertaining games. Hospitality is simply about making others feel welcome in your home.

Sunday Reflections (February 10)

Yesterday, Dave and I dropped off Miss G at the nursery, walked to our seats in the second row, and sat down to read our bulletins together for the first time in so long we couldn't even remember the last time we'd attended an entire service together.

It was an amazing service to attend, too. Our church has special weekends a few times each year when we invite high-profile guests to share their stories. We've had sports legends, television stars, and simply inspiring people who have walked through heartache and come out stronger because of Christ's work in their lives. Anyway, our church's guest this past weekend was Matthew Luhn. His name may not be familiar, but you definitely know his work if you've seen Pixar movies like Toy Story, Finding Nemo, and Up. Matthew Luhn is one of the many people involved in creating the stories we enjoy when we watch Pixar films.

Matthew grew up with a family who encouraged him to use his gift of drawing. They didn't squash his dreams but instead encouraged him to shoot for the stars in his career. He ended up working as an animator for The Simpsons at the age of 19. As a parent, I was really encouraged by this example of being your child's number one cheerleader. Once G gets old enough to exhibit some of her gifts, I hope to be able to encourage her to use them. As a Christian, I hope to encourage her to use those gifts in service to God, who blessed her with them. She may not become a superstar, and that's okay. My prayer is that she does the best she can do with what God has given her.

One of the favorite things I heard in the service was something our pastor said during the altar call. He said, "The problem is that we want to write our own story. And then we mess it all up." It is certainly human nature to pluck that pencil from our life's Author and begin to write our own version of the story. But that only leads to a bunch of crumpled up paper. Instead, we need to let God hold the pencil and trust that his story for our lives is a true masterpiece and better than anything we could ever create.

Sunday Reflections (January 27)

Most churches see an increase in attendance this time of the year thanks to New Year's resolutions and people pledging to attend church more in the next year. It's funny to me, then, that my church attendance this month has been less than stellar. Let's see, there was teaching the preschoolers on the first week, sitting in the lobby with Miss G the second week, attending my nephew's dedication and consequently spending more time in the lobby with Miss G last week, and staying home this week thanks to a promised ice storm and the desire to avoid slipping on any ice while carrying my daughter into church by myself since Dave had other church obligations.

I guess I was physically inside a church 3 out of the 4 weeks this month, but I wasn't able to sit and receive what God might have for me through worship or a sermon. I can feel it, too. It reminds me of a time in my life a few years ago when Dave and I were serving every single time the church doors were open and unable to attend any services. That was one of the darkest periods of my life. I don't want to return to that.

I hope that next month will bring more opportunities to be filled rather than to pour out. (Not that pouring out is bad; I just need to be refilled.) In the meantime, I'll be listening to those sermons I missed this month and asking God to fill me with His strength this week.

Sunday Reflections (January 13)

Our church is in the middle of a series about why we do what we do in our weekend services. Today the focus was on worship--my absolute favorite part of a church service. (Really, if I'm late and miss even one song, I feel like my experience at church is incomplete.)

Now, you can argue that worship isn't just about a church service and that it isn't really just about the segment of the service when we sing a few songs. It's true that worship encompasses our entire lives and that it can be expressed in church through not only singing but giving, praying, studying the Bible, and serving various ministries. But my favorite expression of worship is what is usually titled "worship."

All of that to say, I was really looking forward to hearing this sermon. But I had a little girl who absolutely loves to make noise in church and requires me to hang out with her in the atrium when she's not in nursery. I didn't hear most of the sermon while I kept Miss G occupied, but the subject got me thinking about worship and what my favorite worship songs are. This is a little different from what I normally post, but below are a few songs that get me excited about worshiping God.



What are some of your favorite worship songs?

Sunday Reflections (January 6)

My Sunday morning was spent teaching two- and three-year-olds, so today's reflection is a quote from the book I'm currently reading, Saving CeeCee Honeycutt. It's a young girl's first attempt at praying:

Hello. My name is Cecelia Rose Honeycutt, and I live at 831 Tulipwood Avenue. The preacher on the radio said if we opened our hears and asked, we'd be saved. He said it was that simple. So I'm asking, will you please save Momma? Something's wrong with her mind and it's getting worse every day. And while you're at it, will you save me too? There's nothing wrong with my mind, but I sure could use some help down here. I'll do anything you say. Thank you. Amen.

Often in the entertainment world, whether it be movies or books, a first prayer is depicted as comedic. But what struck me in CeeCee's prayer was her innocence. Yes, it's funny that she introduces herself to God and that she tells Him where she lives. But it's clear that there's no pretentiousness in her prayer.

My hope is that my prayers, although not including an introduction or my address, would contain such honesty and openness with God. He doesn't need me to wear a mask. After all, He knows exactly what I'm feeling before I even open my mouth. May my prayers be as honest as CeeCee Honeycutt's.

Reading List 2013--Part One

With the arrival of Miss G last May, my brain became mush, and the most it could handle was watching House Hunters or My First Place. I tried to read, but my free time was spent napping or rushing around, trying to finish up household chores while I could.

I've really missed reading, though, so this year I've decided to be more purposeful about it. My goal is to read two books each month for a total of twenty-four books read this year. I'm hopeful I can balance fiction and nonfiction, but my to-read list is leaning heavily on the nonfiction side. (If you have any fiction books that you'd like to recommend, please leave your suggestions in the comments.)

On the blog, I'm going to track the books I plan to read and follow up with reviews of what I've read. Because I know my interests may change and because I really don't know which must-read books I'll come across this year, I've decided to post quarterly rather than list all my to-reads in one post.

Here are the books I plan to read in the first three months of the year:

Financial Peace Revisited by Dave Ramsey (January nonfiction selection)
Dave and I attended Financial Peace University at our church a couple of years ago, and at least one of us enjoyed it. (Ha!) We have some new financial goals that we'd like to meet, so I'm hoping Financial Peace Revisited will give me a boost in the motivation department.

Saving CeeCee Honeycutt by Beth Hoffman (January fiction selection)
I can't remember where I'd first heard about this book, but I picked it up on my last visit to the library. Since I have it, I might as well select it for my January fiction read.

7: An Experimental Mutiny Against Excess by Jen Hatmaker (February nonfiction selection)
My employer annually offers book groups for employees to join. I've been a participant nearly every year, and this year, I'm planning to lead a discussion of 7. I'm excited about reading this book, which I'm expecting will challenge me and others in the group.

The Hobbit by J. R. R. Tolkien (February fiction selection)
Can you believe I have never read The Hobbit? With the recent release of the movie based on this book, I've decided it's a good time to dig into this classic.

Unglued by Lysa TerKeurst (March nonfiction selection)
Unglued was all over the blogosphere when it came out last summer, and it's been sitting on my bookshelf for a few months. It's about time I actually read it!

Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte (March fiction selection)
I have picked up this book, started it, and then put it down without finishing. In March, I hope to actually finish this classic.