I thought that this past weekend, I would spend Saturday evening at home while Dave was at church, then join him for the first service on Sunday morning. But wouldn't you know, my plans were changed when Dave asked me to pinch hit for some volunteers who couldn't lead small group in the kids' ministry. Because Dave works with the elementary-age kids, that meant I was assigned to lead second and third graders. If you know me, you know that I love working with preschoolers. Ever since I started volunteering in children's ministry, I've only worked with kindergartners and younger. Saturday night's task was, strange as it may seem, a bit intimidating for me. (I know--who's afraid of second and third graders?)
Although I was dreading it, I walked into the classroom and headed to a table full of boys and one girl playing with Legos. We started talking about school, and after one boy said he wished he could be finished with school already, we chatted about what they wanted to do when they grew up. Before we knew it, we were headed to large group, and then it was time for small group.
Because we had so many kids in the class (I think the count was 44) and only 3 small group leaders, my small group was actually quite large. We went through the questions, including one that really struck me: How does following God sometimes take you out of your comfort zone?
Immediately, I thought of where I was in that moment--teaching elementary-age children. I never would have chosen on my own to work with that age group, but I knew that God wanted me to. The result was an incredible time connecting with the kids over Legos and talking about standing up to bullies at school and encouraging girls that they were beautiful and that they don't need to worry about looking dumb. (As a new mom to a daughter, that last part really got me.)
Saturday evening definitely took me out of my comfort zone, but as I reflect on this past weekend at church, I learned the most from my time teaching those "scary" older kids.
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
Friday, October 12, 2012
Thirty-One
My thirty-first birthday began with my daughter crying in her crib at one in the morning. My tired, selfish self thought, Really, baby girl? After weeks of sleeping until 5 you decide to wake up early on your mama's birthday? My loving, knowing-all-too-well-these-days-are-numbered self thought, Oh, she just wants to wish her mama a happy birthday before anyone else. I focused on that positive thought as I reached down for her, picked her up, and took advantage of some extra snuggles. (She did give me a birthday gift by sleeping until 7 after that, so my selfish side had no reason to whine.)
Having a baby this year was the number-one reason why my thirty-first birthday felt so weird. Every other year since graduating from college and starting my career, I've tried to take a day off from work to celebrate the day by sleeping in, reading, and going out for a nice dinner with Dave. Last year, to celebrate my entrance into another decade, we splurged and stayed at a fancy hotel in Grand Rapids. This year, however, I didn't have the option of taking a break from my responsibilities. Trust me, I wouldn't want another quiet birthday if it meant not having Miss G around. But the day was a reminder of how different my life is now that I'm a mom.
Another reason this birthday felt different from the rest was because it offered me a time to reflect on the past year, and although a lot has happened since I turned thirty, I hadn't slowed down enough to actually think about all I've experienced in the last twelve months. Since I turned thirty, we bought a house, Dave lost his dad to cancer, we had a baby, we went through a period of uncertainty with Dave's employment, Dave's mom lived with us for two months, my job description changed to work-at-home mom/work-at-office mom, and we changed churches. Phew! All year, people would compliment me on how well I was taking things, but it wasn't until my birthday that I realize I'd really been stuffing most of the emotions that came with all of those events. By the end of the day, I was just plain tired after contemplating everything.
Last year, my hope was that I would finally feel like an adult, and I'd say that I certainly accomplished that. This year, however, is the year to rebuild. Our lives were thrown into a tailspin by both good and bad things, so now I hope to get back on track, find out who I am now that my titles include "Mama," and continue living this crazy life. I know I won't get my act together right away, and I know it will never be perfect, but I hope I'll have a year that I can look back on and be proud of, one where I can say, "God was clearly working on me and changing me to be a better follower of him."
Having a baby this year was the number-one reason why my thirty-first birthday felt so weird. Every other year since graduating from college and starting my career, I've tried to take a day off from work to celebrate the day by sleeping in, reading, and going out for a nice dinner with Dave. Last year, to celebrate my entrance into another decade, we splurged and stayed at a fancy hotel in Grand Rapids. This year, however, I didn't have the option of taking a break from my responsibilities. Trust me, I wouldn't want another quiet birthday if it meant not having Miss G around. But the day was a reminder of how different my life is now that I'm a mom.
Another reason this birthday felt different from the rest was because it offered me a time to reflect on the past year, and although a lot has happened since I turned thirty, I hadn't slowed down enough to actually think about all I've experienced in the last twelve months. Since I turned thirty, we bought a house, Dave lost his dad to cancer, we had a baby, we went through a period of uncertainty with Dave's employment, Dave's mom lived with us for two months, my job description changed to work-at-home mom/work-at-office mom, and we changed churches. Phew! All year, people would compliment me on how well I was taking things, but it wasn't until my birthday that I realize I'd really been stuffing most of the emotions that came with all of those events. By the end of the day, I was just plain tired after contemplating everything.
Last year, my hope was that I would finally feel like an adult, and I'd say that I certainly accomplished that. This year, however, is the year to rebuild. Our lives were thrown into a tailspin by both good and bad things, so now I hope to get back on track, find out who I am now that my titles include "Mama," and continue living this crazy life. I know I won't get my act together right away, and I know it will never be perfect, but I hope I'll have a year that I can look back on and be proud of, one where I can say, "God was clearly working on me and changing me to be a better follower of him."
Monday, September 17, 2012
Sunday Reflections--September 16
I was all set to type up my notes last night, but Miss G had a terribly difficult time settling down. Instead of sitting in front of the computer, I ended up rocking my baby girl to sleep--a change of plans I didn't necessarily mind.
This week's sermon about prayer focused on what our prayer should look like. Pastor Jameson used the Lord's Prayer (Matthew 6:9-13) as our template as we went through three questions about prayer.
1. Should we use patterns or be spontaneous? (v. 9) In the Lord's Prayer, we're given a pattern. The prayer begins with addressing God, then it's a request relating to God, followed by a request that's related to human needs. But before we think all we have to do is follow this exact formula, we need to know that this pattern is given to guide our praying. It's more of a launching point than a strict pattern to follow. The Lord's Prayer sets up the priorities of our praying. As we look at each line of the Lord's Prayer, we can allow it to inspire us about what to pray in those categories. I have heard of the ACTS pattern for praying, but Pastor Jameson mentioned the CHAT acronym yesterday:
Confess
Honor
Ask
Thank
2. Should we express intimacy or reverence? (v. 9) We can express both intimacy and reverence. "Our Father" begins the prayer on a note of intimacy, but we know that God should be given respect, too. In Him, we have both fatherly love and heavenly power.
3. Should we focus on big stuff or small stuff? (v. 9-13) In case you haven't caught on, the answer to all these questions is both. Pastor Jameson gave us some practical ways to pray following the format of the Lord's Prayer:
"Hallowed be your name." Pray that God would be honored by people around the world, whether those in public positions to give Him honor or those who are being persecuted for loving Him.
"Your kingdom come." Pray that Christians around the world would witness and spread the good news.
"Your will be done." Pray that our lives will conform to God's will as it is written in Scripture.
"Give us today our daily bread." Pray for our practical, earthly needs.
"Forgive us our debts." Pray to confess our sins.
"Lead us not into temptation." Pray that He will rescue us from the evil one.
This week, our challenge was to build on setting a time and place to pray by incorporating what we should be praying about. It was a good reminder of the basics of prayer.
****************************************
This week's sermon about prayer focused on what our prayer should look like. Pastor Jameson used the Lord's Prayer (Matthew 6:9-13) as our template as we went through three questions about prayer.
1. Should we use patterns or be spontaneous? (v. 9) In the Lord's Prayer, we're given a pattern. The prayer begins with addressing God, then it's a request relating to God, followed by a request that's related to human needs. But before we think all we have to do is follow this exact formula, we need to know that this pattern is given to guide our praying. It's more of a launching point than a strict pattern to follow. The Lord's Prayer sets up the priorities of our praying. As we look at each line of the Lord's Prayer, we can allow it to inspire us about what to pray in those categories. I have heard of the ACTS pattern for praying, but Pastor Jameson mentioned the CHAT acronym yesterday:
Confess
Honor
Ask
Thank
2. Should we express intimacy or reverence? (v. 9) We can express both intimacy and reverence. "Our Father" begins the prayer on a note of intimacy, but we know that God should be given respect, too. In Him, we have both fatherly love and heavenly power.
3. Should we focus on big stuff or small stuff? (v. 9-13) In case you haven't caught on, the answer to all these questions is both. Pastor Jameson gave us some practical ways to pray following the format of the Lord's Prayer:
"Hallowed be your name." Pray that God would be honored by people around the world, whether those in public positions to give Him honor or those who are being persecuted for loving Him.
"Your kingdom come." Pray that Christians around the world would witness and spread the good news.
"Your will be done." Pray that our lives will conform to God's will as it is written in Scripture.
"Give us today our daily bread." Pray for our practical, earthly needs.
"Forgive us our debts." Pray to confess our sins.
"Lead us not into temptation." Pray that He will rescue us from the evil one.
This week, our challenge was to build on setting a time and place to pray by incorporating what we should be praying about. It was a good reminder of the basics of prayer.
Sunday, September 9, 2012
Sunday Reflections
Today was the start of our church's new ministry year. Our senior pastor returned from his annual study break to begin a new series on prayer. The announcements were full of new programs that will be starting up again now that we're entering the fall season. Today also marked the beginning of a new adventure for our family.
Back in July, Dave was offered a part-time position in the children's ministry at our church. It was an amazing opportunity for him, but it was a hard decision to make because taking that job would mean our family would have to return to the main campus of our church, a place we'd left last fall to help start a satellite church campus closer to our house. We prayed about it, discussed the pros and cons, went back and forth about what Dave should do, and finally decided that God was leading Dave back into vocational children's ministry and our family back to the main campus.
Because we promised to stay at the satellite campus through the month of August, today was our first Sunday back at the main campus. As I was sitting in the service, feverishly taking notes on the topic of prayer, I decided that today would also mark the beginning of a series I hope to keep up on the blog. In order to better process what I'm learning each week at church and to hopefully encourage at least one of my five readers, I'm going to use this spot to summarize each week's sermon.
In the first week of a series on prayer, Pastor Jim shared three motivations for praying based on John 15:1-8:
1. The Relationship Motivation
2. The Desperation Motivation
3. The Fruitfulness Motivation
Too often we view prayer as a transaction and God as a cosmic vending machine. We pray that God will give us a promotion at work, and if it happens, we're happy and feel like prayer worked. But that's not the main purpose of prayer. Our main motivation for praying should be the relationship that will grow out of it. The branches that grow from the grapevine in John 15 symbolize the connection and intimacy we will have with God.
We often view prayer as something that should be done for the big things. We may pray for an upcoming surgery but not for finding our lost keys. We may thank God for getting us through a big test, but we may forget to thank Him for getting us through a normal work day. John 15:5 says, "Apart from me you can do nothing." As much as I may think I'm getting through life on my own, I'm really desperate for God's presence in my life. I am 100% dependent on Him. Pastor Jim posed a question for us that has really made me consider the state of my own prayer life: Are we desperate enough to make prayer part of our daily schedules? Looking at the current state of my prayer life, I have to admit I don't act like I'm desperate for God to be a major part of my life.
The final motivation for prayer is fruitfulness. John 15:8 says, "This is my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit." According to Pastor Jim, fruit can be character traits (the Fruits of the Spirit); good works done in Jesus' name; the people we introduce to Christ; and answers to prayer. Answers to prayer is probably one of the most popular fruits as far as what people would like to come from prayer, and sometimes we focus on prayers that God hasn't answered. Instead, we should focus on all the things that God has said and will say yes to.
Pastor Jim challenged us to decide when and where we will pray this week. I've decided to designate my time feeding Miss G in the morning as my time to pray. It certainly happens every day, so I'm hoping that will help me build this habit in my life. If you're realizing the need to be more disciplined in your prayer life, I encourage you to start by designating a time and place to pray for 10 minutes every day this week. Don't let guilt be your motivation to pray more. Instead, be encouraged by the relationship that will deepen, your desperation for God to work in your life, and the fruit that will come.
Back in July, Dave was offered a part-time position in the children's ministry at our church. It was an amazing opportunity for him, but it was a hard decision to make because taking that job would mean our family would have to return to the main campus of our church, a place we'd left last fall to help start a satellite church campus closer to our house. We prayed about it, discussed the pros and cons, went back and forth about what Dave should do, and finally decided that God was leading Dave back into vocational children's ministry and our family back to the main campus.
Because we promised to stay at the satellite campus through the month of August, today was our first Sunday back at the main campus. As I was sitting in the service, feverishly taking notes on the topic of prayer, I decided that today would also mark the beginning of a series I hope to keep up on the blog. In order to better process what I'm learning each week at church and to hopefully encourage at least one of my five readers, I'm going to use this spot to summarize each week's sermon.
*************************************
In the first week of a series on prayer, Pastor Jim shared three motivations for praying based on John 15:1-8:
1. The Relationship Motivation
2. The Desperation Motivation
3. The Fruitfulness Motivation
Too often we view prayer as a transaction and God as a cosmic vending machine. We pray that God will give us a promotion at work, and if it happens, we're happy and feel like prayer worked. But that's not the main purpose of prayer. Our main motivation for praying should be the relationship that will grow out of it. The branches that grow from the grapevine in John 15 symbolize the connection and intimacy we will have with God.
We often view prayer as something that should be done for the big things. We may pray for an upcoming surgery but not for finding our lost keys. We may thank God for getting us through a big test, but we may forget to thank Him for getting us through a normal work day. John 15:5 says, "Apart from me you can do nothing." As much as I may think I'm getting through life on my own, I'm really desperate for God's presence in my life. I am 100% dependent on Him. Pastor Jim posed a question for us that has really made me consider the state of my own prayer life: Are we desperate enough to make prayer part of our daily schedules? Looking at the current state of my prayer life, I have to admit I don't act like I'm desperate for God to be a major part of my life.
The final motivation for prayer is fruitfulness. John 15:8 says, "This is my Father's glory, that you bear much fruit." According to Pastor Jim, fruit can be character traits (the Fruits of the Spirit); good works done in Jesus' name; the people we introduce to Christ; and answers to prayer. Answers to prayer is probably one of the most popular fruits as far as what people would like to come from prayer, and sometimes we focus on prayers that God hasn't answered. Instead, we should focus on all the things that God has said and will say yes to.
Pastor Jim challenged us to decide when and where we will pray this week. I've decided to designate my time feeding Miss G in the morning as my time to pray. It certainly happens every day, so I'm hoping that will help me build this habit in my life. If you're realizing the need to be more disciplined in your prayer life, I encourage you to start by designating a time and place to pray for 10 minutes every day this week. Don't let guilt be your motivation to pray more. Instead, be encouraged by the relationship that will deepen, your desperation for God to work in your life, and the fruit that will come.
Tuesday, July 17, 2012
The Library
I love visiting the library. Since my childhood visits, when I would fill a plastic basket with reads, I have always enjoyed exploring the shelves to see what would catch my eye and provide hours of enjoyment during the next few weeks.
It's a good thing I'm so in love with the library, because after what has happened during my last two visits, I may have been tempted to give up out of embarrassment.
Situation #1: A nearby town has an amazing, three-story collection of books. We love going to this library because it provides a much better selection than our town's one-story building. It's also fun to simply explore a new place. Although we'd been checking out books from this library for more than a year, I had always relied on Dave's card and hadn't registered my own. A few weeks ago, I decided it was time to stop embarrassing my husband with girly books to check out and use my own card. I approached the librarian, explained what I wanted to do, and waited while she phoned my hometown's library to confirm that I was a patron. I was surprised when the librarian waved me over and said, "She wants to talk to you." As I took the phone and said hello, the librarian from my library started asking me questions. "What is your address?" "Why isn't it on file with us?" As I explained that I had moved only a few months before and hadn't realized I had to register my new address, she seemed to get more upset. She sternly told me, "Well, you need to come here with proof of your new address within the next week. If you don't, your account will be blocked." What?! Now, I can understand a librarian being angry about someone using his or her card if that person has moved out of the district, but I was still paying taxes to fund her collections. I promised I would stop by, then handed the phone to the librarian, who looked shocked by what had happened. Fortunately, she was kind enough to proceed with registering my card, and I was able to check out books under my name.
Situation #2: Yesterday, we returned our books to the super library and went in search of new reads. I picked up a couple of interesting nonfiction books then selected a Sophie Kinsella book that I hadn't read yet for my "mindless" read. We approached the front desk, and I handed over my library card and books to the same librarian who had gone through embarrassing situation number one with me only a few weeks earlier. Everything was fine, until she held up the Sophie Kinsella book and asked, "Would you like to buy this?" I'm sure I must have had a confused look on my face as I glanced at the scratched-out barcode inside the front cover. "No," I replied, wondering how that book had ended up next to all the other Sophie Kinsella books that were not for sale. I told her where I'd found it, explained that I didn't want to buy it, and finished up the transaction, walking away without the book. Again, I had somehow managed to embarrass myself at my favorite library.
It seems that every time I visit this library, I'm taking a chance. Will I leave unscathed with my pride intact? Or will I find yet another way to make me look like a goon? I guess I'll just have to go and find out.
It's a good thing I'm so in love with the library, because after what has happened during my last two visits, I may have been tempted to give up out of embarrassment.
Situation #1: A nearby town has an amazing, three-story collection of books. We love going to this library because it provides a much better selection than our town's one-story building. It's also fun to simply explore a new place. Although we'd been checking out books from this library for more than a year, I had always relied on Dave's card and hadn't registered my own. A few weeks ago, I decided it was time to stop embarrassing my husband with girly books to check out and use my own card. I approached the librarian, explained what I wanted to do, and waited while she phoned my hometown's library to confirm that I was a patron. I was surprised when the librarian waved me over and said, "She wants to talk to you." As I took the phone and said hello, the librarian from my library started asking me questions. "What is your address?" "Why isn't it on file with us?" As I explained that I had moved only a few months before and hadn't realized I had to register my new address, she seemed to get more upset. She sternly told me, "Well, you need to come here with proof of your new address within the next week. If you don't, your account will be blocked." What?! Now, I can understand a librarian being angry about someone using his or her card if that person has moved out of the district, but I was still paying taxes to fund her collections. I promised I would stop by, then handed the phone to the librarian, who looked shocked by what had happened. Fortunately, she was kind enough to proceed with registering my card, and I was able to check out books under my name.
Situation #2: Yesterday, we returned our books to the super library and went in search of new reads. I picked up a couple of interesting nonfiction books then selected a Sophie Kinsella book that I hadn't read yet for my "mindless" read. We approached the front desk, and I handed over my library card and books to the same librarian who had gone through embarrassing situation number one with me only a few weeks earlier. Everything was fine, until she held up the Sophie Kinsella book and asked, "Would you like to buy this?" I'm sure I must have had a confused look on my face as I glanced at the scratched-out barcode inside the front cover. "No," I replied, wondering how that book had ended up next to all the other Sophie Kinsella books that were not for sale. I told her where I'd found it, explained that I didn't want to buy it, and finished up the transaction, walking away without the book. Again, I had somehow managed to embarrass myself at my favorite library.
It seems that every time I visit this library, I'm taking a chance. Will I leave unscathed with my pride intact? Or will I find yet another way to make me look like a goon? I guess I'll just have to go and find out.
Sunday, July 8, 2012
The Power of Words
I've finally got my hands on The Help and have been enjoying it immensely any spare moment I can find. A few days ago, I came across this excerpt and knew I needed to write it down so I would always remember:
She say, "Mae Mo bad."
The way she say it, like it's a fact, make my insides hurt.
"Mae Mobley," I say cause I got a notion to try something. "You a smart girl?"
She just look at me, like she don't know.
"You a smart girl," I say again.
She say, "Mae Mo smart."
I say, "You a kind little girl?"
She just look at me. She two years old. She don't know what she is yet.
I say, "You a kind girl," and she nod, repeat it back to me. But before I can do another one, she get up and chase that poor dog around the yard and laugh and that's when I get to wondering, what would happen, if I told her she something good, ever day? . . .
After while, Mae Mobley come over and press her cheek up to mine and just hold it there, like she know I be hurting. I hold her tight, whisper, "You a smart girl. You a kind girl, Mae Mobley. You hear me?" And I keep saying it till she repeat it back to me. (The Help, p. 92)
It's so easy for us to forget the power of words. Now that I have a child who is just beginning life with a clean slate, I have been reminded of how important it is to watch what I say. I want Miss G to be built up by my words, not torn down. I also want her to hear my words building up others rather than tearing them down.
It's easy now to encourage Miss G. She is surrounded by people who tell her she is the cutest, smartest, best baby in the world. But I know my desire will be challenged when she gets older. It won't be so easy to follow when she spills the milk for the hundredth time or makes a masterpiece with permanent marker on her bedroom wall.
In the same way, as she comprehends more and more of what I say, it will be difficult for me to always say positive things about people. I don't want to be an example of a person who snaps at her daddy or badmouths others. I want her to see the value in positively encouraging others, whether in their presence or not. I want her to understand the power of her words and what they can do to help people.
Just like Aibileen, I want to tell Miss G, and others in my life, that they are something good every day.
Tuesday, June 26, 2012
One Month
Miss G, you turned one month old last Tuesday, but because our Internet and TV went out for a week, I wasn't able to post your one-month update.
The beginning of your first month was a bit difficult. Mama and Daddy were learning how to take care of you, and you were dealing with some challenges. Because your bilirubin levels were high, we had to use a bili light for you. You didn't mind one bit, but you did mind the daily blood draws we had to do 4 days in a row! By the end of your first week, you were good to go, and we were happy that we didn't have to visit the doctor again until your two-week visit.
At your two-week visit, we found that you had regained your lost weight (you'd been well under your birth weight of 7 lbs. 1 oz. with the first-week troubles) and had climbed up to 7 lbs. 7 oz.! We haven't had you officially weighed lately, but you are becoming a chunk! You've outgrown the newborn size diapers and are now on to size 1! I am so grateful that you are eating well and gaining weight.
One big milestone for your first month was eating from a bottle for the first time. Daddy did a great job feeding you, and you seemed to love it! We only give you a bottle every once in a while to get you used to it for when I go out or go back to work in the fall.
You also experienced your first bath. At first you weren't sure what to think of it, but you hardly cried. Now, it's one of your favorite parts of your nighttime routine. You are so relaxed and chilled out once Daddy wraps you up in your hooded towel and holds you. We usually read your bedtime story at this point, and you like to fall asleep in the middle of it.
Your first official outing was to Chick-fil-A and the library after your two-week visit. We went to both early in the morning to avoid crowds. Other than that day, we kept you home or in the car until you were four weeks old. Our favorite restaurant was Sonic because we could all stay in the car.
Baby Girl, we love you so much. I can't imagine life without you now that you're here. I have enjoyed getting to know you during this past month, and I am excited about seeing your personality develop more and more as I get to know you better.
It is hard for me to believe that you have been with us now for 5 weeks. You are growing and changing every day!
The beginning of your first month was a bit difficult. Mama and Daddy were learning how to take care of you, and you were dealing with some challenges. Because your bilirubin levels were high, we had to use a bili light for you. You didn't mind one bit, but you did mind the daily blood draws we had to do 4 days in a row! By the end of your first week, you were good to go, and we were happy that we didn't have to visit the doctor again until your two-week visit.
At your two-week visit, we found that you had regained your lost weight (you'd been well under your birth weight of 7 lbs. 1 oz. with the first-week troubles) and had climbed up to 7 lbs. 7 oz.! We haven't had you officially weighed lately, but you are becoming a chunk! You've outgrown the newborn size diapers and are now on to size 1! I am so grateful that you are eating well and gaining weight.
One big milestone for your first month was eating from a bottle for the first time. Daddy did a great job feeding you, and you seemed to love it! We only give you a bottle every once in a while to get you used to it for when I go out or go back to work in the fall.
You also experienced your first bath. At first you weren't sure what to think of it, but you hardly cried. Now, it's one of your favorite parts of your nighttime routine. You are so relaxed and chilled out once Daddy wraps you up in your hooded towel and holds you. We usually read your bedtime story at this point, and you like to fall asleep in the middle of it.
Your first official outing was to Chick-fil-A and the library after your two-week visit. We went to both early in the morning to avoid crowds. Other than that day, we kept you home or in the car until you were four weeks old. Our favorite restaurant was Sonic because we could all stay in the car.
Baby Girl, we love you so much. I can't imagine life without you now that you're here. I have enjoyed getting to know you during this past month, and I am excited about seeing your personality develop more and more as I get to know you better.
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